You caused the pain by throwing the first stone
You destroyed the foundation that you were standing on
If you think you are entitled to so much privacy,
Why be in a live-in relationship?
Why express that you want me to think of this as mine,
When you’re married to your privacy?
An omission of information is still a lie;
You can call it sweet names all you want,
But with-holding information can be as bad as lying:
If I went out with someone behind your back,
Lied to you, and kept lying about it
Until you saw clear proof I was lying,
Would you try to work things out?
You betrayed me because you felt like I didn’t trust you,
But you kept half of your feelings closed in your chest;
How could I know that you were hurting
When you wouldn’t open your mouth to say anything?
You want to say that it was my fault you lied,
Want to blame me for not being good to you,
Want to defend yourself,
And talk about integrity,
But a person with such quality
Seeks not scapegoats,
For he would not lie
Even if he were being forced to;
You weren’t in duress
When you chose to be shady;
You wanted me gone but could not say it;
Your cowardice in facing your feelings
Is hardly my fault or responsibility,
Yet I’m here bearing the massive load you dropped
Because I think you have something worth it,
But every time you behave as though you are appalled
That your honesty is being questioned
When I can’t understand
Why my phone says one thing
And you say something else;
A stormy year has passed since you broke my trust
Do you really think it’s regained so soon?
With such a poor attitude?
Your inclinations toward secrecy
Still jar my freshly wounded heart
Had you been forthright,
I could have been less severe,
But you lied to me for almost half a year,
If the matter were as simple as you claim,
Why couldn’t you, with your self-proclaimed integrity,
Come clean and faced the consequences?
Why did you trick me and hurt me so much?
Why do you continue to tear at my heart?
You think that I hurt you and don’t consider you
But what right have you to be considered when you didn’t consider me
You’ve been selfish and want to stubbornly cling
To your perceived notions of privacy and secrets
If that is your game, then I can no longer play
You must leave me be–
Bleeding and hurting,
Jaded and alone.